Within the War Within

Within the War Within

I wage war against an unseen enemy
In a never ending battle set on an imaginary battlefield
Deep within the darkest crevices of my mind
but held on the grandest of all stages for your viewing pleasure
and i sincerely hope you are enjoying the show

I cannot succeed in my fight
My epic crusade against time
Time...
My powerful invincible arch nemesis
The odds of prevailing are not in my favor

I am defeated on every conceivable front
In every conceivable way possible
My defenses are too delicate to combat time's brutal onslaught
And I am left in a pathetic heap
Battered, bruised, and left for dead
A victim of  reluctant circumstance
I have become yet another trophy for time's ever growing mantle

In my years I have taken so much for granted
And have gotten away with so much
But everything eventually meets it's end
And time was there waiting for me
Leaving me bare
Mind void of thought
Soul void of hope
Heart void of compassion
I have nothing left to give
And I am left feeling inhuman

I worry about the things I have no control over
Focusing on the insignificant
While time's master plan clandestinely unravels before me
I can only worry about worrying for so long
Before full blown panic breaks out
And time victoriously strolls off the battlefield

My mind spins violently out of control
Fueled by the insatiable hunger for something more desirable
It has refused to grasp anything concrete
Only concentrating on the imaginary

I do not know what awaits me
But I just want to be free
Free of time
Free of the past
Free of my own doubting mind

I've forgotten what it feels like to believe
Sad but unfortunately true
I want to be free to live the life I think I should live
and live it the way I think it should be lived
But for now I am entangled in a mess inside of a disaster
neatly encased in a war zone
Entranced by thoughts of my eventual emancipation